Walls Around My Heart : MiscarriageHelp.com

Walls Around My Heart

by Ellen M. DuBois on 02/05/19

I built walls around my heart after my miscarriage. I never felt that kind of pain before, and didn't want to feel it again. It took a long time for them to come down. Time spent grieving and healing. I had to learn to stop blaming myself for my miscarriage, too. 

Maybe the walls were a way of protecting myself. What I do know is I needed time. Just processing that I lost my baby was too overwhelming. I really had to take things one day at a time and some were better than others. The bad days were terrible and felt like they'd never end.

But, they did. I cried a lot and prayed a lot, too. 

Over time, the walls began to come down. They didn't come crashing down- it was more more like piece by piece. The smaller the walls around my heart became, the more love was allowed into my heart and out from it, too. It became easier to feel as the pieces of my wall fell away.

Sending you love and prayers,




Welcome to MiscarriageHelp.com. My name is Ellen DuBois, host of this site, miscarriage survivor, and author of I Never Held You: Miscarriage, Grief, Healing and Recovery. If you or someone you love has suffered a miscarriage, please know you're not alone. Connect with people who understand.

Note: Some people find it difficult to post comments here because it's not very clear how to do it. Just hit the "comment" link under any post. I'll get your comment and respond. If it's easier, please email me. [email protected]

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If you'd like to check out my line of handmade jewelry, Hope Angel Bracelets, click the link to etsy below to visit my shop. I also make remembrance/miscarriage awareness bracelets. Love and light to you, Ellen

Welcome to MiscarriageHelp.com. My name is Ellen DuBois and I am deeply sorry for your loss. MiscarriageHelp.com is a support site for women and their families who have suffered the pain, loss and grief after miscarriage. I respond personally to each email and post and have been doing so since 2006. It's an outreach to me. I try to connect and give whatever support I can to those who have walked the often lonely road after miscarriage. Why? I don't want anyone to feel as alone as I did over twenty years ago after I miscarried. I'm not a doctor. 
I'm just a woman who's lived through it and am here to listen, share and provide a space for you to share with each other, too.- Love & comfort to you, Ellen 
You can purchase my book, I Never Held You, miscarriage, grief, healing and recovery at Amazon by clicking on this link: I Never Held You